Let Me Translate for You: An (O)ther Writer Responds to VS Naipaul

Responding to recent drivel published on the intertubes, I couldn't help but dere-compose the following:

“Assholish writers like Naipaul are different, they are quite different. I read a piece of writing and within a paragraph or two I know whether it is by an asshole like Naipaul or not. I know [such assholes are] unequal to me...And inevitably for an asshole, Naipaul is not a complete master of a house, so that comes over in his writing too...Naipaul, who is only marginally relevant these days anyway neo-colonial apologist, when he became an asshole, lo and behold, it was all this assholish tosh. I mean this in the very unkindest of ways."

Or,

"I am VS Naipaul. I am very, very afraid of women. Women are scary! I must denigrate them so I can feel less inadequate. I am inadequate in every way. I think that people reading my words are too stupid to figure this out about me. I am a sad, tiny little man, and I am acting out."

Or,

"Edward Said, known for his seminal work Orientalism, has described Naipaul's books on Islam - Among the Believers and Beyond Belief - as "intellectual catastrophe". Said, who [was] Professor of English at Columbia University, observed: "In the post-colonial world he's marked as a purveyor of stereotypes and disgust for the world that produced him - although that doesn't exclude people thinking he's a gifted writer." In the West, he said, Naipaul was "considered a master novelist and an important witness to the disintegration and hypocrisy of the Third World"."

Bite. people. and. not. in. a. fun. way.

Presented Without Comment: VS Naipaul on Other Writers

“Women writers are different, they are quite different. I read a piece of writing and within a paragraph or two I know whether it is by a woman or not. I think [it is] unequal to me...And inevitably for a woman, she is not a complete master of a house, so that comes over in her writing too...My publisher, who was so good as a taster and editor, when she became a writer, lo and behold, it was all this feminine tosh. I don’t mean this in any unkind way."

Speaking at the Royal Geographical Society on Tuesday, Naipaul, best known for his novels about the legacy of British colonialism, was asked if he considered any woman writer his equal. He replied: “I don’t think so.”